Do Cheap Tickets Build Audiences?

The Sun newspaper recently ran an offer that enabled readers to see Don Giovanni at the Royal Opera House in best seats for £12- something of a bargain since my local arthouse cinema is charging nearly £20 to see it on a screen by live link. This was one of many initiatives over the years by the Hamlyn Trust to encourage the less well off and the unconverted to enjoy ballet and opera- or to put it another way, break down these art forms’ elitist image. This is not dissimilar to the National Theatre’s £10 ticket offers.

I would love to know the level of success because my own experience is that these kind of offers tend to be taken up by existing fans happy to get a cheap ticket or by people willing to spend say £10 but not the normal price. Either way, the audience is not significantly increased.

I don’t doubt that price is an issue for many people considering attending ballet and opera but I don’t think it’s a case of saying, “Try it and then you’ll see it’s worth £50.” If people can afford those prices, the chances are they will give it a try when they’re ready.

Which leaves us with the intractable problem- how do you diversify the audience for the arts? Or to put it another way, how can you justify public subsidies for art forms that are only enjoyed by the well-off middle classes?

My suggestion is a national registration scheme that gives people a discount card if they can prove their income is below a certain level. For many this would simply mean showing that you are in receipt of some kind of benefit or family credit, for others it might mean providing proof of earnings. Then all subsidised art forms should be obliged to make 10% of their seats available at a realistically cheap price (compensated if necessary by raising the full prices) on a first come first served basis to those in possession of a discount card.

The Power Of Music in Retailing

Music goes straight to the emotions. In our shop, we like to make an emotional connection with our customers, so we play music that we know most of them like. We play jazz swing, sixties and modern ballads- melodic songs that are familiar and appealing to the older women who form the bulk of our customers. Recently we've been playing Abba, because of the popularity of Mamma Mia!, and that's gone down well.

Music that's relaxing without being soporific helps customers think this is the shop for them and gets them in the mood for purchasing. The same applies to music-on-hold.

No doubt sounding like the middle-aged fuddy duddy that I am, I'm at a loss as to why some sports shops play very loud, drum'n'bass rap music. They may want to appeal to a niche part of a younger crowd but the alienating effect on everyone else must be huge. I suspect this is the mistake of allowing staff to play their own favourite music. Equally bad is the kind of bland musak that used to be very common in lifts and department stores but fortunately seems to be less fashionable these days.

You still have to be careful in the choice of music. Not long ago, I was standing in an inexorably long line, listening to golden oldies, when The Kinks' So Tired Of Waiting came on. Quite.

The Old Ways Are Sometimes The Best When It Comes To Marketing

A story in the Southampton Daily Echo shows the importance of choosing the right medium for your target audience-even if that medium isn't the latest trend and doesn't come recommended by advertising agencies.
A company planned to spend £10,000 on advertising their marine storage, using an email campaign and all the usual paraphenalia of modern marketing. They also decided to put a postcard in the local post office next to the marina. The result was all £250,000 of space was let for a cost of a mere 50p.

Plus ca change... the old media and new media aren't that different

People often say that the internet has created a new way of doing business and in some respects they're right. But what strikes me are the similarities wtih what has gone before.

It seems to be true that Websites have to please customers whereas earlier media needed to put advertisers first. Then again, subscription only magazines and subsidised or subscriber-based Public Service Broadcasting always put customers first. And when you think about it, many websites won't survive unless they attract the visitors advertisers want to reach.

As someone in the retailing business, I notice how alike a successful website and a successful shop are. Both need to decide which market segment or 'tribe' they're aiming at. For both, customers come first (or they should). Both need to have an attractive window to lure their target in. Both need to lead their visitors around their site with clear signage. Neither can afford to overwhelm their visitors with too much information or too many choices in one go. They both have to be user friendly. Both need to provide a straightforward buying process (if we're talking about an e-shop). The internet is great at one-to-one marketing but this is what the best shops do, with their regular customers at least.

Of course there are important differences. An e-shop can reach niche markets with a 'long tail' of products that even the biggest mail order catalogue could not previously have served. A website needs to make its sale through its copy and images, whereas a bricks'n'mortar store has staff who can help a customer to the product that's right for them. An e-shop has a much better opportunity to get to 'know' its customers by tracking their movements and purchases.

Speed and scale have changed and every medium has its quirks, but I believe that the basics of good marketing are the same whether the channel is old or new.

Untangling The Web Part Two

Speed is of the essence. Web users are an impatient lot. To them, ten seconds is like watching Gone With The Wind. Unless the user has high speed broadband, a site containing clever graphics and big photos will be s-l-o-w to download. Forget art for art’s sake, if there’s not a good reason for an image, leave it out. A web page should be no more than 60 KB. If necessary, start with small-ish photos to prevent delays in downloading and then make sure they can be enlarged.

Users don’t like having to click more than three times to get to what they want. Don’t make them click to ‘enter’ the site and don’t have too many stages in the buying process. The ‘buy’ button must be prominent on every page including the home page- and the phone number as well.

I was amazed to come across a South coast theatre website that didn’t have its box office number on any of the events pages. 30-40% of people may book by phone, so your number as well as the online buying facility must be prominent on every page. Your physical address must also be easy to find. This is important. It gives your website credibility and, another thing, it’s the law.

When it comes to the buying process, try to keep down the number of choices people have to make. Think of buying a theatre ticket- What date? What time? Stalls or Circle? Front, Middle or Back? What price? Any Discounts? Is it any wonder people give up and go to the cinema instead?

Your site must be easy to read. Not everyone has perfect vision (especially our ageing population) or the latest 20 inch widescreen monitor. Make sure type can be re-sized and that the blocks of type are ‘liquid’ so they will adjust on an old style 4:3 ratio screen, rather than the right-hand side being cut off.

Make sure the text contrasts with the background. Your older ( and usually richer) visitors will really appreciate this. Google, Yahoo, BBC all opt for a white background- and they should know. Highlight important information with strong simple colours. Black, white, red, blue- keep away from subtle shades.

Keep each page simple. Most people give the page a quick scan. One clear topic per page means the visitor doesn’t have to make choices about what to read. Even the Home Page should only give prominence to the four things that visitors are most likely to want to do. Use hypertext links (links within the page content) to enable people to find out more information, rather than trying to cram it all on one page.

Make your site interactive. If you want your visitors to become your customers and ultimately your advocates, give them the chance to comment on your products and your website or to ask questions, or even to talk to each other. A site which welcomes comments adds credibility to what it is marketing.

Whatever the website looks and acts like, the most important thing remains content. Remember the slogan- Great sizzle but where’s the sausage?

Don’t sell, inform… the sales will follow. People have already made a choice when they visit your website- they want information or they want to buy something or maybe they want to tell you something. Whatever the reason, they didn’t come to be sold to.

Websites win or lose on the quality of the words. Don’t think anyone can write the text. The great Jakob Nielsen’s research on Useit.com shows that changing ordinary text to web-orientated text can double website usability. Unless you’re one yourself, pay an expert to go over all your text and rewrite it to work on the web (e.g. use information-carrying words and actionable phrases, cut verbiage, make it search engine friendly). For example,‘The Hills Are Alive’ is a clever headline for a brochure but ‘The Sound Of Music’ is what works on a web page, because it carries the clear information needed both by search engines and by users scanning the screen. This is something I’m good at, by the way.

A few other points. Increasingly people are using their mobiles to visit websites. If yours doesn’t work, tell your designer to change the codes to conform with standards for handheld devices.

It’s tempting to convert print documents into PDFs for your website. Don’t, unless it’s something people are going to print themselves. People expect to be able to interact with a website, so a fixed document is frustrating.

It’s a good idea to get visitors to fill in a form, say to join your email list. Much as you need to know lots about them for marketing purposes, on this occasion keep the questions to a minimum or they won’t bother. You can ask them more later.

Finally Test. Observe even half a dozen people using your site- where they get stuck, where they go wrong. And employ the analysis tools that are often available from website software or servers or from Google Analytics to find out the pattern of visitors’ usage. Use this information to improve your website and put the customer in charge.

I’m hesitant after all of the above to suggest you look at my shop’s website. There are a number of ways it falls short of ideal. This is mainly because we used a template e-shop called Cubecart which is very but not entirely adaptable. Still, I’m on a continuous mission to refine and improve it, so any comments will be much appreciated.

Untangling The Web Part One

This is a longer version of a feature that appeared in Encore magazine.

I have three seconds to convince you to read this article. That’s the… Oh, you’ve gone. I was going to say, that’s the average time someone spends on a website before deciding whether to stay or leave.

Your website is probably the most important marketing tool you have, so it’s too important to be left to a web designer or consultant. It’s up to you to make sure people can get around your site easily and find all the information they need and you want them to know. There’s no excuse. So much research is available about what works and more importantly what doesn’t.

As with all good marketing, the key is to look at it from the customer’s point of view. ‘To see ourselves as others see us’ as Robbie Burns said. The problem is, we’re so involved in our business, it’s difficult to step back. Yet it’s crucially important because, unlike other media, the customer is in charge of the web.

I’ve recently been involved in constructing a website for our shop. There is a lot of research available from sites like Useit.com and thesitewizard.com about how people use websites. Of course, some people are more internet savvy than others but many of us are still trying to work out why we have to click ‘Start’ to turn off their PC. Some have quicker brains for working out how to navigate a site but you can’t expect most of your users to be like that any more than you can expect them all to be able to solve the Rubik’s Cube.

The playwright Bertolt Brecht kept a toy donkey on his desk and when he wrote something he would turn to it and say, ‘Would you understand this?’ (in Gerrman of course.) This is not to do with how intelligent we are but how knowledgeable. Let’s face it, when it comes to websites, a large number of us and our customers are donkeys.

I’ve found there are a number of ‘rules’ your website must obey if you want your visitors to stay and use it.

First, research why people are visiting your website then make sure the content of your website answers their needs. They may want to know you sell, prices, how to find you, what your business is about, how to buy an item or simply who you are. The Home Page should let people know they’ve come to the right place (‘Welcome to Anytown’s largest theatre where you can find out information about forthcoming shows, about the venue and buy tickets online’) and offer a few samples of the site’s content. The links that provide answers to key questions must be prominent and easy to find.

Appearance matters. People judge your professionalism and reliability by the quality of the design.

Appearance doesn’t matter. Don’t let design, however good, get in the way of ease-of-use. Google is hardly the prettiest website but it makes it easy for people to find what they’re looking for.

The key to usability is Don’t Be Different. I know we all love originality but we’ve all visited thousands of sites, so if your site doesn’t have the same layout as the vast majority of other sites, we get confused. For example, if we find the Contents list isn’t in a line along the top or down the left side, we may miss what they’re looking for. We also expect to click back to the home page with a link on the logo and they’ll be looking for a ‘previous page’ or ‘back’ button. Link titles that pop up when the mouse goes over a link help people understand where they’re likely to be heading. People expect Search. Make sure it’s there in a recognisable box at the top of the page and make sure it works.

The same basic format for each page helps users know where they are. All of this makes your site easy to navigate.

And no pop ups. We all hate pop ups because they - Visit my website thelewisexperience.co.uk -make us lose track. Many of us block them.

Part Two tomorrow.

Website Lets Down Mary Queen Of Shops

I was looking at the website of Yellowdoor, the retail consultancy run by Mary Portas, Queen Of Shops. I know she could transform the fortunes of the little shop my wife and I own; I know this agency is far more successful at PR than I could ever hope to be. So in a way, I feel who am I to criticise? However I have to say, their website is not very good.

See for yourself. Firstly, you have to click to get anywhere, which is always a frustration. So, click on the Retail Strategy page, though it could be any of them. The first thing you have to tackle is the tiny difficult-to-read type, made even worse because white out of brown is always going to be less easy to read that black out of white. Then there’s the counter-intuitive scrolling- the arrow at the bottom pointing down makes the page scroll to the top and the upward pointing arrow at the top takes you down. When you try to read, there are distracting photos constantly scrolling up the left hand side.

Finally perhaps the worst sin because it’s the easiest to have got right- series of typographical errors- Shopping is another scence (presumably ‘science’)… We will apply out (our) expertise. There’s no excuse for not proofing properly.

Sticking with copy but turning to the About Us page, it seems Mary Portas’ newspaper column ‘will be a launch pad for a National Shop Awards in 2006”- ‘was’ surely. You must keep your website up-to-date or your company looks inefficient and unreliable.

As happens so often, clever design has triumphed over usability. I am pretty sure that this would not be true of Yellowdoor’s retail consultancy work but a website like this just creates that little doubt.

How New Labour Lost Its Market

When the government party comes fifth in an election behind the Greens and the BNP, you know they’ve got problems. If they were a business, they’d be heading for bankruptcy.

Heres my admittedly simple-minded take on the history of British politics in the last hundred years. Things started so well for Labour at the beginning of the 20th century. They spotted a new market of newly enfranchised working class voters, added a targeting of liberal intellectuals who’d previously supported the Liberals, and the consequence was, the Labour Party formed its first government. Their second and greatest success came after the second world war, when they had a massive majority of voters hungry for change. They delivered on their promises with the National Health Service and much more welfare state and government control of industry and the economy.

This didn’t last because of the poor state of the economy in war-ravaged Britain but they were now an electable party and, better still, the Conservatives adapted their product to the new climate and embraced the welfare state. After further periods in government in the sixties and seventies, the Labour product became discredited as the welfare state became more expensive to manage and the government-control of industries was discredited by strikes instigated by powerful left-wing Unions. A good time then for the Conservatives to come up with a new improved product that promised to tame the unions and use market forces to sort out industry and the economy. The delivery of low income taxes and prosperity was crucial.

Poor handling of the economy led to the downfall of the Conservatives after a long period of success. However, after three defeats, the Labour leadership’s analysis was (rightly) that they had allowed themselves to become controlled by the hard left and their outdated policies. They could only get themselves elected if they appealed to the middle ground. So, just as a generation earlier the Conservatives had embraced the welfare state, now Labour now took on the Conservatives’ clothes- yes to market forces, no to union power, yes to low taxes, no to government intervention.

This would have been a good idea if they had retained a bedrock of solid left-of-centre policies. However New Labour abandoned their original market. They have let poor working class get poorer and have outraged liberal intellectuals because of the Iraq war, 42 day detentions and other reasons too numerous to list. If the new market was more reliable this wouldn’t necessarily matter but the ‘middle ground’ is fickle, caring only about how prosperous they feel. While the economy was ‘safe in their hands’, Labour was safe. Now, the party may be beginning to realise that New Labour was built on sand and it no longer has any rock on which to rely or rebuild.

It’s a shame really because things could have been so different. The collapse of the world economy has exposed the failures of a purely market economy. It should have been the opportunity for Labour to show that their traditional Keynesian approach to economics, where the state intervenes to control and stimulate the market, is a better model. No chance of that with the Conservatives.

Every lasting business knows that following the market is a short term solution with temporary results. Long term success relies on an authentic product with which at a profitable section of the market can identify. Governments will always come and go depending on how they are perceived to be protecting us, primarily by managing the economy well but also against ill health, terrorism and so on. But parties, like businesses, can only continue if they have core values that voters/customers connect with. The problem is, no-one knows what either of the main parties’ values are anymore.

Faking It

Does authenticity matter, asks Seth Godin. If the fake Rembrandt has fooled the experts, if Shakespeare didn’t write parts of his plays, if Churchill put his historic speeches on record after the event, if some of The Beatles’ songs weren’t recorded by all four of the Fabs, does it matter?

If the effect of the fake on you is the same as the ‘authentic’ version, it probably doesn’t. It is, if you like, all in the mind, and we should all trust our own feelings not what we’re told to feel. In business, it does matter though, because, if someone deliberately sells a fake Rolex, no matter how authentic looking, as the real thing, and they therefore charge a much higher price than justified- that’s fraud. And if you tell a customer something that isn’t true, you’ll be found out eventually, seriously damage your reputation- and may even be prosecuted.

Turn 20% into 80%

Thanks to Gary Bencivenga for reminding us about The Pareto Principle, which states that 20% of your customers give you 80% of your business. He tells us that it also applies to other aspects of your life. For example, you probably wear 20% of the clothes in your wardrobe 80% of the time. Most people find that they only spend 20% of their working week doing that which gives them 80% of their satisfaction. When I was a manager, I spent most of my time doing tedious admin. Now, as a freelance marketer, I spend nearly all my time on writing and PR, make a bit more money and- most importantly- am much happier.

Humane Resources

Human Resources have a deservedly bad image. In my experience the term exactly sums up the attitude of too many people doing that particular job. They don’t regard employees as people, simply ‘resources’ that happen to be ‘human’ as opposed to technical or whatever. The main point of their jobs seems to be to find clever ways to exploit employees or get rid of them.

What a joy, then, to hear about the human resources people at Zappos- the hugely successful American catalogue shoe retailer. They want the best, most committed people to work in their phone sales department. So, they train them for four weeks on full salary and, at the end of that period, they offer them a $1000 to leave! The theory being that if the employee would rather have a few dollars than work for them, they’re not the kind of committed people they want.

This is brilliant because one of the biggest problems most of us have as employers is the time it takes to find out that someone isn’t right for the company. This way you have a good chance of weeding them out early.

Then when these people work for Zappos, they’re given free rein to do whatever it takes to make a customer happy. There are no scripts, standard responses, jobsworth attitudes or time targets. Every aspect of the way they treat their employees is an anathema to most Human Resources people and their patrons- Accountants.

For more about the radical customer-first approach of Zappos, read this article by Bill Taylor.

Page Turner or Turn Off? Part Two

I was surprised to go into a Bose shop recently and be told that they don't publish a cataloguie because people can go to the website. This is very shortsighted. Brochures drive large numbers of people to websites as well as generating sales in their own right.

Now where was I? Oh yes. Let’s turn to the inside pages. Most people automatically look at a point slightly above the centre and to the right, so if you want them to look at the rest of the page, you must lead them round it. A good layout uses a face looking inward or a curving body to move the eye in a circular motion around the whole page and to focus it on the key information. Painters have been using this and other rules of composition to control eye movement for hundreds of years - check out Botticelli’s The Birth Of Venus.

As for the words, the best brochures sell benefits not features. Since this is a basic rule of marketing, I’m surprised how often it’s broken. For example, just because the show won Best Musical Award, it doesn’t follow that your customer will enjoy it; there’s a world of difference between Les Mis and Hairspray. The best copy talks to the reader about what they want: “When you leave the theatre dancing down the street, you’ll know why this show won Best Musical Award.”

When it comes to design, the marketer stays in control of the best brochures. Designers may love pink type coming out of a red background but we know our customers won’t be able to read it. They may use 8 point type to make more room for images but we know it must be at least 12 point. A good designer will make the brochure look lovely but the good marketer keeps the artist’s feet on the ground and insists that important messages are communicated clearly.

Finally, the best brochure will have been checked by independent readers, who will have included older customers if they make up a significant proportion of the audience.

There are many more techniques that a brochure specialist can suggest to boost sales but simply incorporate the above and you’ll ensure that your brochure is a page turner instead of a turn-off.

Fowl Play in The Apprentice

I know The Apprentice is set up and edited to make great TV, but I'm still astonished at the basic failings it reveals each show of these young business people.

Every week they are given a task and spend next to no time planning and researching. Last night they were trying to find sundry items in Marrakesh and spent a lot of time running around like headless chickens (and there was a halal butcher just waiting to make a few more chickens headless for them.) At least Lee's team had researched where to get kosher chicken- Jennifer's team didn't even research what 'kosher' meant. None of them seemed to have a clear plan as to how their day's shopping was going to pan out or any contingencies for things going wrong.

Once again there was poor teamwork. They should know by now the strengths and weaknesses of their colleagues and yet Jennifer let Claire twice sabotage Alex's bartering with shop owners. Despite or perhaps because success depends on teamwork, it seems many of the candidiates have been deliberately chosen because they are poor team players who believe the way to personal victory is to undermine their rivals.

Worse of all last night was Jenny's decision to try to bribe a shopkeeper into not providing tennis rackets to the rival team. There is some debate about whether this might be a legitimate business practice but this argument takes the view that business is a dog-eat-dog world. To some extent, business is about survival of the fittest but a successful market economy is supposed to deliver value and that depends on following rules and behaving fairly in order to provide best value. For example, it's legitimate to win a contract through making the best bid but if you win it through bribery (or by operating a cartel) the end user does not get the best value. Jenny could have helped her team to victory by her unfair tactic but the winning team was supposed to be the one who found the right products at the best price.

It is perhaps not surprising that Jenny thought she might get brownie points for her underhand behaviour since many big firms have indulged in unfair practices. Microsoft have been fined by the EU for anti-competitive practices; BA indulged in dirty tricks against Virgin Atlantic. Before we give up trying to do business honestly, it's worth considering that if the shop manager had accepted a bribe, the shop owner would have been out-of-pocket. Translated to a bigger scale, if she had accepted a bribe from a competitor to sabotage sales, the shop owner might have been out-of-business, and ultimately customers would end up paying higher prices because of the lack of competition.

Copy That

Copywriting is the marketing activity I love best. So I was fascinated to find the great e-marketing guru Seth Godin complaining bitterly in his daily blog about a copy editor who had taken all the life out of his writing.

This was surprising because Seth writes meticulous prose. Reading his blog, you’ll be hard pressed to find grammatical errors or spelling mistakes. The words and sentences hang together and make sense. When he states a fact, he gives a reference. He doesn’t exaggerate. He doesn’t repeat. He avoids clichés like the plague (thanks to William Safire for that one).

Those are the basics. However complying with the ‘rules’ only makes sure your reader isn’t put off from respecting or even reading your work. What separates the good from the average is the evidence of a mind at work. It must be clear that it was written by a real person with their own voice, someone who has an opinion robustly argued or who makes an emotional connection with the reader.

I can only assume that Seth’s copy editor tried to take out of his copy that which makes him so readable- his individual way of speaking and his highly informed view of the world.

Is Your Brochure a Page-Turner or a Turn-Off?

What makes the perfect season brochure? A winning formula involves more than making it look pretty. If the brochure you’re involved with isn’t using the following techniques and quite a few others, then you’re losing sales.

Let’s begin at the end. If the brochure has been displayed back to front or thrown casually on a table, its back cover may be the first sight the customer has of a brochure, so a good one will have the venue’s name clearly displayed for people who know your business and will actually pick up a brochure for it.

When you put something on the back cover, it’s like shining a Super Trouper on it. Along with the inside covers and the centre spread, it’s one of the ‘hot spots’ that get noticed. A well planned brochure won’t waste these positions with boring information like How To Find Us or Terms & Conditions, because these are the best pages to sell the most valuable products.

Flipping the brochure over, the front cover will be shouting ‘PICK ME UP!’ It will use more tricks than Paris Hilton to grab attention, apart from forgetting to put knickers on. Look at magazine covers- you’ll nearly always see one big image (probably an attractive face (probably an attractive famous face)). An unusual picture can also make an impression. What they won’t have is a lot of tiny images, because trying to please everybody pleases nobody.

The brochure cover will use strong colours, especially red since that’s a colour more likely to appeal to women who form the majority of shoppers.

Notice how the most important reasons for picking it up are at the top. A designer sees the whole cover on a screen but we know that our piece of print may be stuck behind something on a tiered rack, so we need the venue name and the key products to be featured on the visible area.

Next time, we'll look at the inside pages.

No News Is Bad PR

It’s great to get publicity for a stunt- even better when you don’t actually do the stunt. Well, unless you’re found out.

The Southampton Daily Echo reported that the city’s major shopping centre West Quay would be turning its lights off for Earth Hour. This was excellent publicity for a centre that’s closed on a Saturday night. Even better, the Echo ranked it alongside Sydney Harbour Bridge as a world landmark!

All well and good, except unfortunately their lights didn’t actually go off. Which turned a good story into bad publicity. The lesson is, when you try to get publicity on the back of an external event, make sure you’ve told the people on the ground.

I want to tell you a story

Seth Godin's latest blog is about how whatever you do in the course of your work tells your customers a story about your business. It reminded me that I didn't post my recent article from Encore magazine about the story your marketing tells. Here it is-

“I want to tell you a story.” Like many comedians, Max Bygraves understood from the start of his career the power of the story to attract and keep an audience’s attention. I discovered recently, having been involved in marketing a new shop, that the best window dressers too aim to tell a ‘story’ in their displays.

This doesn’t mean the literal kind of narrative you might see in Selfridges windows at Christmas. Put simply, it’s that the colours, the props and the products themselves should work together to say something. This ‘something’ might be suggesting certain garments and accessories that will go well together on a night out or it might be ‘Don’t forget to buy a present for Mother’s Day’.

When marketing entertainment, we need to tell a story if we want to sell tickets. The flier or brochure cover says instantly in the colours, the style and the words what the show or venue is about. Bright colours will put across fun and excitement- check out Really Useful Group’s Joseph poster. Black and white for a drama or pop star will suggest something moody and sophisticated. Think of the marvellous image David Pugh produced for Rebecca or the consistent effectiveness of Chicago’s marketing even after ten years.

An image can make the story or end it. As the old Chinese proverb says, ‘one picture is worth a thousand words’. (Actually the saying was coined in the 1920s by Fred Barnard, an American PR man, who said it was an ancient proverb to give it more cachet. Marketing people, eh?)

We work in show business so we know how much appearance helps. Think of when TV producer Jack Good came across this weedy bloke with a very good record and put him in sexy leathers- Gene Vincent never looked back. At the other end of the scale, Brian Epstein took The Beatles out of their jeans and leather jackets and put them in suits and ties to say to people- we may be revolutionary but we’re loveable and family-friendly too.


The picture or pictures must tell the story of the show- I’m involved in publicising a show called Tango! Tango! at the moment and the main photo is a sensuous shot of an entwined couple, not on the dance floor, but isolated in a cavernous space with one shaft of light picking them out. It says everything about the all consuming passion of the dance.

How pictures are arranged makes a big difference. This is sometimes known as design— a word that is clearly unknown to many promoters and venues! Throwing a lot of images into the advertisement or brochure page is a bit like saying ‘People like country music, rock’n’roll and hiphop so if I put them on the same bill I’ll get three times the audience.’ The images must work together to tell the story and should literally move the eye around the page in a journey that will keep the attention and reveal the story of the show or venue. In this case, the story is about the content of the show and must create a desire to see it and it’s also the information about where and when it can be seen.

The most obvious way of telling a story is through words- whether in a press release (we even talk of newspaper ‘stories’), in brochure copy, in a mailing or even in an advertising slogan. ‘Lie, Cheat, Steal… all in a day’s work’ says the poster for Glengarry Glen Ross at the Apollo.

‘Feel The Magic’ was a phrase I used. It didn’t merit serious analysis for meaning but the two words (I mean the first and third!) instantly conveyed the appeal of going to the theatre. Whether it’s two or two hundred words, every one should say something about the product and lead the reader on a journey. Like Max’s stories, you must grab the attention, keep them interested and lead to a punch-line- in our case, get them to buy a ticket.

Alarming Nipple- How Not To React To Bad Publicity

Jeanne Bliss on the website Marketing Profs Daily Fix brings our attention to a great example of how not to react to bad publicity. In Lubbock Texas recently, a woman’s nipple ring was detected by the security system. She was forced to go through a humiliating procedure during which she had to remove the ring in front of officers. Naturally this made the Transportation Security Administration look very bad.

The situation could have been saved at this point. They could have accepted they did wrong, but no, “It appears that the Transportation Security Officers involved properly followed procedures.” They could have explained what they had done to ensure this sort of thing never happens. Instead they offered a woolly “we are changing the procedures”.

Most important of all, they could have said ‘sorry’. Instead, when you wade through all the flummery, here’s their ‘apology’: “TSA acknowledges that our procedures caused difficulty for the passenger involved and regrets the situation in which she found herself.” In other words, sorry but you’ve only yourself to blame.

A commentator invents a new motto for the TSA, “You fly… we pry.”

Innocent Until Proven Guilty?

The son of a family friend was recently accused of a crime. There was no proof, simply one person’s word. The police arrested him in the middle of the night, seized his clothing then released him on bail. Despite him being a minor and despite guidelines that state such people should be dealt with quickly, it took five months before they finally decided they had no evidence on which to charge him. (I could add that the ‘witness’ turned out to be totally unreliable.) Then, when he went to collect his clothes, they handed them over in large brown bags marked ‘Police Evidence’ and ‘Prisoner Property’ to carry through the streets. All in all, it was a highly traumatic experience for a young person who has always been law abiding.

The police should ask themselves whether treating an innocent young person like a criminal, especially after there is no doubt of his innocence, is likely to encourage him to regard the police as worthy of support in the future. A commercial company offering this kind of customer service would be damaging its brand and risk going out of business.

Joss Stone Makes The Flake Ad

I love the new Cadbury's Flake TV ad featuring Joss Stone. It perfectly recreates the style of a fly-on-the-wall documentary about making a record. As the recording progresses, there's a slight problem necessitating a pause. During the break, Ms Stone idly picks up a Flake and casually sings, as any of us might, the well-known jingle in her inimitable voice. Instead of putting the bar straight into her mouth as you would expect from the previous ads, thus rather obviously suggesting fellatio, she breaks off a small piece and eats it. The coup de grace is when she looks down and casually flicks off some crumbs from her front, which anyone who's eaten a Flake can relate to.
Perfect in every way- beautifully structured; referring to the universally known Flake ads tradition while at the same time undermining it for a modern audience; and the self deprecating humour at the end that makes a real connection. See it and lots more TV ads at Guardian Media's Creative Lounge

What's your real voice?

I was watching a documentary on Al Bowlly, a great crooner from the 1930s, who briefly rivalled Bing Crosby in popularity. I think it was Carrie Grant who commented that at a certain stage he found his own voice- that unique personal quality, she said, that makes a singer seem 'real' to his or her audience. The same is true of writers, painters and any other kind artist. It struck me that this is very like finding the Unique Selling Proposition for your business product. Of course, in the case of business, it's easily squandered if you disrespect it by, for example, using the name to sell other inferior or barely related products.